The Bachelor{ette}


If you read my other blog post about The Crown, you'll know I've really felt convicted by the Holy Spirit to closely filter what I allow as "entertainment" in my life. It's been a process for me, really....and one where I haven't always been obedient.

I didn’t always used to be so “radical” in my views of entertainment...and my motive has NOTHING to do with religious conformity. It’s a personal conviction that I have after being corrected by the Holy Spirit over my addiction to “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette.” 

Now before you click off and tune me out because you think I’m one of "THOSE Christians" or because you don’t share the same convictions...I urge you to read on.

I was a Bachelor/Bachelorette ADDICT! I loved grabbing a glass of wine and watching from the first episode where the contestants exit the limousine and meander up to the "Chosen One" and go to ridiculous extremes to captivate their attention and stand out from the crowd of the 30 others doing the same thing.

  • I was captivated about the idea of two people falling madly in love and finding the one who makes their soul's a romantic notion.

  • I watched with envy as the girls dressed up like pageant contestants with pristinely primped hair, false eyelashes, and spray on tans on their perfectly toned beach bodies.

  • I sighed at the romantic dates, helicopter rides, exotic destinations, private concerts and professions of "love."

  • I watched as they all laughed in unison whilst tipping back their fancy glasses of champagne.

  • I got enjoyment out of watching the drama unfold as people acted like complete uncivilized animals, caddy girl fights, macho chauvinistic rivalry, lies, deception, manipulation, and bullying.

It was escapism for me lusting after an edited version of romance. An experience most of us will never get to experience in real life. The show is created to capture the viewer into the drama and after awhile we begin to develop harsh opinions, judgments, criticisms, as we pick our favorite contestants and begin to despise the unmistakable "villain." It's like an equivalent of a fantasy football league as we watch who gets roses and who gets sent home ugly crying with mascara and boogers streaming down their faces. 

Until Holy Spirit spoke to my heart one night: 

"Heather, why do you watch this garbage when it's so far outside of what you know I created marriage to be? I'm not in this. Why do you consider this 'entertainment?'" 


Ouch. Once you hear the Lord speak,  you can't UNhear it...

I realized that I was lusting for a fairytale fantasy. But the reality is, I hold high value for God's intention of marriage. It's my favorite thing to study in the bible and my favorite types of books to read.  He created men and women with different attributes of His character so that together WITH HIM we can experience completion as in the Godhead. This show does not promote a God-orchestrated union, but rather a world view of marriage. 


I'm not trying to impose my convictions on you as condemnation but I do have some real questions to present: 

  1. Does this show model Christlike behavior?

  2. Do you feel encouraged to hold out for God's best and allow Him to be the author of your love story?

  3. Is God's intention of marriage held to high regard in this show?

  4. Do you experience feelings of comparison or dissatisfaction with your singleness or in your marriage because of what what this show is portraying?

  5. Is lust, envy, drama, deceit, drunkenness, immorality, and impurity things that a representative of the Most High God should be watching to be entertained?

  6. Is this show desensitizing your spirit to ungodly ways?

These are bold questions, I get it. They were hard for me to ponder as well. But as I draw closer to God, my heart begins to break for what breaks His. And reality is, this show is heartbreaking. 

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